Perfect Parents. I hate that term, with every fiber of my being. Where once it was a compliment, it has now become a derogatory term.
I follow a number of parenting advice pages on Facebook. I like being able to see how other people are finding parenthood, and understand the struggles/adventures they are going through. Looking through the pages helps me to appreciate the life I’m living, and the little boy I have. I see posts from parents who need help sorting out their benefits, because something has gone wrong and they won’t be able to pay their rent/buy their children food. I see posts from parents who are worried because their child doesn’t seem to be developing the same way their friend’s has. I see posts from parents asking for prayers for their child who is in hospital or has recently passed away. It really makes you look at your life in a different way, and appreciate all you’ve got. It also helps you to keep an eye out for milestones that could be coming your way any minute, or to understand a problem you’ve been experiencing yourself.
I love advice pages. I don’t often get involved in them, unless it is something I have experienced myself and the same response hasn’t been given tenfold. I do like to help out where I can though, and to be encouraging and supportive.
What really gets my goat, is when people comment just to be nasty. They don’t agree with the way someone is parenting, so they have to stick their nose in and tell them exactly how they feel. Don’t do that, you’re such a bad Mum! How do you sleep at night? You’re pretty much abusing your child! If you keeping doing that, your baby is going to die!
Everyone has their own views on parenting. Some you will agree with, others you won’t. I for one, am completely against ear piercing for young children. I believe that a child should be old enough to ask for them to be pierced, and to understand that it’s going to hurt and that they must clean them and look after them. That doesn’t give me the right to put other mothers down for getting their baby’s ears pierced though…although many people think it does.
What happened to the strong parenting community? The community where everyone used to look out for other people’s children? The community where everyone used to support each other the best they could? It certainly doesn’t exist anymore. It seems that a lot of parents are just out to prove themselves better than everyone else nowadays. They want to prove that they are doing things the right way, whilst you are just being a lazy/neglectful parent. You hear so many stories of a child 1 bullying child 2, but when child 2’s mother confronts child 1’s mother, they get an earful and the child goes unpunished. Nobody wants to be shown up…nobody wants someone else to show their child is less than perfect.
It’s not even these parents that I have the biggest problem with. It’s the people who throw around the term ‘perfect parents’ to cover their backs. If they do something that is against the recommendations (such as weaning before 6 months etc), then out come phrases like watch out for the perfect parent brigade! And then there will be a group of women tittering away together, about how the perfect parents are going to come along and whoop their bitchy little butts. I’m sorry, but to me that makes them the bullies. They are the ones that make people afraid to stand up for what they believe in. They are the ones that make ordinary people feel about about themselves and the way they are parenting. They are the ones who should be ashamed of themselves. They are the ones who need a proper smack around their smarmy little faces. They are worse than the so-called perfect parents which they are always mocking.